Dinner Plans #23

Imma let you finish but… Sifted has some of the greatest snacks of all time.

APÉRITIF:

Awards season is upon us, albeit a lonely, inevitably less glamorous one. Historically, I’ve used the occasion as an excuse to watch movies every night of the week, familiarize myself with new artists (by which I mean listen to the first 30 seconds of their most popular song before tapping back to, depending on my mood that day, a 2010 or 2020 Taylor Swift album), and force my friends to spend their Sunday nights eating an unjustifiably extravagant dinner while we discuss how big these bows are. I'm simply and unfortunately not interested in this year’s awards season. Just like the rest of the world, I’m bothered by Emily in Paris’ nom, but even more bothered by the information I recently received that it is meant to read as em-uh-lee in pah-ree. And while I understand a virtual red carpet is the only option right now, how is a moment so bizarre that it leaves us with a photo this legendary ever supposed to transpire via Zoom? 

Not Amy Schumer sprawled across the red carpet, not Kimye’s (RIP) indifference, just Laverne Cox’s disgust.

I'll leave the rest of the Golden Globes discourse to Natalie Coffen, our Chief Culture Vulture and your snack shaman for the night. She runs NTV, a monthly meetup (zoom vibes!!!) she describes as “a book club but make it television.” Natalie has pulled together specific snacks for Sifted today—something for each nominee (think: pigs in a Mank-et). We, of course, have regular Dinner Plans for you too, which are also charged with a bit of Awards Show Energy, meaning crispy, snacky and unnecessarily over the top. And if you think we snubbed your favorite snack, let us know in the comments. 

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ON THE MENU THIS WEEK:

DINNER PLANS

1.  Not Bad Pad Thai: Not gonna lie, I ate a lot of takeout this week (me, a martyr, supporting local restaurants). Among those meals was Night + Market, one of my (and Gwyneth’s!) favorite Thai spots in LA. I don’t mention this to brag, only because you can, and should, make their pad thai at home. And stop right there—I know what you’re thinking, and that your finger is already hovering over the Seamless app. 1. Read up on delivery apps and help your local haunts. 2. Let this recipe convert you! No tamarind paste needed! It’s super week-or-work-night friendly, requires 0 extra trips to specialty stores, and is truly, actually, good. Or, if you’re really looking to invest in your pad thai game, order this kit that is Chrissy, but more importantly, Pepper-approved. So say goodbye to the old me:

   stéphanie 🐌 @stephanie_nam

   why pay $15 on pad thai when you can spend $45 for all the ingredients to make a worse pad thai?

2. Crispy Artichokes: The first time I tried this jarred artichoke trick, which is quite literally draining a jar of seasoned, marinated artichokes, spreading them across a baking sheet, drizzling with a little bit of your best olive oil (very Ina!), sprinkling with even more salt and pepper and roasting in a hot oven until you have a pan of crispy, crunchy, golden brown artichokes, I had no plans for them. One bite reminded me of the perfect fried artichokes at I Sodi, so I piled them into a tiny bowl to serve as a salty pre-dinner snack the way they do. But as I ate more of them, I decided they were akin to croutons. Now, I make them whenever I need something to sprinkle over salads—most recently, a romaine one tossed in a green goddess-Caesar hybrid dressing (read: lots of anchovies, lots of herbs).

3. Chocolatiest Chocolate Cake: Our lord and sugar savior Dorie Greenspan is the brain behind this Lisbon chocolate cake recipe, which starts with a layer of light but fudgy chocolate cake. Chocolate ganache that’s been lightened by whisking, chilling and folding in whipped cream is spread over the bottom layer, and the whole thing gets a heavy coating of cocoa powder before slicing and serving. I baked this cake during the Grammys last year, and despite using a loaf pan and giving none of the components any time to cool which led to a much softer, warmer, more molten cake than the refined, layered one Dorie describes, I was still smitten. Make it the right way, though, so you can experience that ethereal feeling of serving a cake that’s both delicious and stunning, something an impatient girl like me can only dream of.

   

   You vs. the cake he told you not to worry about.

SO YOU’RE WATCHING THE GOLDEN GLOBES

Hi Sifters! I’m Natalie, and I’ll be your Bite Attendant this awards season. Buckle up because we’re about to take off, and our destination is the Golden Globes... TONIGHT. Yes, I know, awards don’t mean anything, and they rarely get it right, but I’ll use any excuse to snack mindlessly while watching beautiful people wear beautiful things. Amy Poehler and Tina Fey are hosting this year, so at least we have that, although they’ll be streaming from opposite coasts. Needless to say, I have concerns. What I’m not worried about, however, is how good we’ll be eating.

1. E! is hosting a “red carpet” of sorts, so if you want to get the party started for cocktail hour, might I suggest The Crown Royal Flush? Ease into the evening with some Pigs in a Mank-et and Schitt’s Leek Dip (from friend of the newsletter Bill Clark). For a lighter load, opt for Hearts of Palm Springs Ceviche (she’s vegan!) or The Prom Cocktail, alternatively known as Prawn-ising Young Woman. If you can only manage one dish, serve Nomadlamb Meatballs with a side of rustic Boratatouille, and you’re guaranteed to impress your wife or one very compromised Rudy Giuliani.

2. If you want to skip the trailers and jump straight to the featured presentation, try a Baked Hamilton, Ozark Beans, or Ted Lasso-back Potatoes. Top it with The Great-ed cheddar cheese and don’t you dare forget Lovecraft Country-Style Biscuits to soak up all the yummy drippings and juices.

3. Not in the mood to make something from scRatched? Stock up on a variety of Haribo from the corner store and call it The Candylorian or order in with The Trial of the Chicago Style Pizza.

What will this awards season bring? Another washed-up rapper performing to a near-asleep Scorsese? A potential rekindling of a Hollywood it couple? And where will Bong Joon-ho be? I need to know where Bong Joon-ho will be.

Yeah, you read that right. No snacks for you, Emily Cooper. Bye! 

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TAKEOUT:

• I’ll be rooting for Ted Lasso tonight, the television equivalent of comfort food. If you haven’t watched it yet, steal your boyfriend’s Apple TV login, then promptly wonder what could possibly be in those cookies, sorry, *biscuits*, Ted gifts Rebecca? Here and here are two recipes that claim to come close to “Biscuits with the Boss” shortbread.

• In other celebrity-adjacent news: I love you Luger’s, but why in the world are you doing this to me?

• And another question: how much did Red Vines pay for the product placement in this music video? Also who orders Baked Alaska for a girl’s night?

  

• Final question: What is Martha’s cat doing in her molcajete?

  officialseanpenn

  

  A post shared by OfficialSeanPenn (@officialseanpenn)

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